Bombshell in Progress

RebeccaUncategorized4 Comments

Sorry guys, I had to take a few days off to visit family in PA and generally clean up after this gaggle of boys.  Man, it’s impossible to keep this house clean in the summer.  By the way, a HUGE thanks to everyone who voted for Top Military Mom!  The Only Girl Among Boys is rocking the top spot for the 2nd year in a row, and this year snagged a spot as “Most Influential!”  Yeeee!

Okay.

Bombshell in progress.

No laughing at the pic, I actually took this for Running Woman to show her my “reward” tank! (Besides, I’m on my treadmill ready to run, I’m not supposed to be all dolled up… right?)

For you to understand how this all started, if you don’t know me very well, go read how I’ve always felt about running HERE.  Please, please note, the most important part of that post, is where I realize… well…

Yeah, for the last few years, well…  There’s always been an excuse for why I’ve been gaining weight.  We were PCS’ing.  I’d just had a baby.  Rinse, repeat.  Jason just came home from a deployment, and he wanted good food.  Jason was deploying and wanted good food.  Jason was home from TDY and wanted to eat out.  Jason was bringing in donuts, and candy, and soda, and junk and I’d be all:

Or why wasn’t I working out?  Why was I content to sit, stagnant, gaining more and more weight?  
Well, I’m an author, and it’s not just sitting to write, or edit, but also to critique and keep up with your genre, so basically I would say:
But you know what?  Do you know who was really responsible for the condition my body was in?
Me.
Sure.  Jason brought the food into the house, but I was too busy to cook good food, right?  Wrong.  No excuses.  This was my freaking mess.  I was the one eating it.  I was the one drinking soda, and nomm’ing on cookies, and cakes and whatever else happened to wander by innocently.
But then… then I stepped on the scale.  Jason was deploying in two weeks, and I weighed 15 lbs more than the day I delivered Brody.  
Oh yeah.  And I had to take a GOOD LONG look at what I’d done to myself.
Pardon the language, but HOW THE HELL had I let this happen??? 
 Jason still chased me up the stairs, I’d never once doubted that he still desired me (Which is the best part of this process) so I just…  what?  Let it go?  I hated that I couldn’t fit in my clothes.  Hated that I was tired ALL the time.  Hated that my feet hurt from the moment I stepped out of bed.  Hated that I couldn’t keep up with the boys.  HATED that I didn’t want to take a picture, or leave the house very much.  Worse than letting myself get…well, fat, was letting myself begin to hate ME.  
I felt like I was buried somewhere deep, under layers and layers of myself.  I had to dig out.
So I made a choice.  Enough was enough.  Jason was leaving, and with him went every excuse I mentioned above.  That’s what they were… just excuses. 
So I started eating Paleo.
I can proudly say, that since it’s been about 10 weeks?  It’s more a lifestyle change, and not a diet.  Seriously.  It’s completely changed my relationship with food, and I’ve never been happier.  
What is Paleo?
Well, it’s kind of like going back to…
Yup.  Only with….
Oh yeah.  Bacon.  And meats, and veggies, and fruits, and nuts and YUMMMMM…. 
I haven’t had a single grain or an ounce of dairy in 10 weeks, and my body loves me for it. 
But I’m not an expert on Paleo.  I’m sure I get stuff wrong EVERY day.  I’ve read a few books, done a lot of net-surfing, but in case you’re curious, here are some sites: 
Yeah, that should do it. 
So I figured once I started this, I’d last like a week. After all, I’ve never stuck with anything in my life.  Ever.  Yeah, about a week, and I’d find myself face down in a bowl of spaghetti like:
As a matter of fact, I still wonder every single day if I’m going to end up like that.  When that little doubt gets into my head, that this is going to yo-yo, or that I can’t maintain it, well I basically tell myself: 
People ask me, “Are you doing this the healthy way?  Are you eating?  That must be awful.  Are you SURE you’re eating?”  Okay, because I snap pics for Running Woman, here’s a few of what I kinda eat.
Little Paleo prep station.  My cheat?  I use Goat’s whey in my morning smoothie.  It’s easier on the stomach than cow’s milk, and I figure I need the protein!  😉  My fave?  Fresh-pressed almond butter from our local organics store, and that local, organic, raw honey.  YUMMMM.

Almond-encrusted Pork Chops
Baked Egg cups with bacon and Asparagus (yeah, I burnt them, don’t judge me…)

Paleo Chicken Parm (home-made sauce and almonds)

Stir fry

My FAVE lunch staple, but I change it up.  Salad, Turkey, Avocado, Strawberries and pine nuts
If you want to check out where I find these? I have a pinterest board, feel free to cyber-stalk it.
I love it.  
I eat all the time, peeps, but I’ve exchanged crap calories and junk food for great, healthy calories.  I gave up sugar for local, raw, organic honey, and my allergies have disappeared.  I have energy from the minute I wake up until I go to bed.  And believe me, with these kids…  Well, I have to keep up with these boys!!!  
So the weight started to come off, and when I hit the 20 lb mark in May… YES, the 20 lb mark!  My doc said I could go back to running.  
Now, remember, usually, when it comes to running, I’m all:
But now?  Now I’m all:
Well, I mean.  Not quite.  But I’m running.  Like RUNNING.  Why?  Because it’s the best stress relief I’ve EVER discovered.  Because it’s teaching me about my willpower and determination.  Because every day I get a little better, and I’m continuously surprised by how far I can push myself.  And mostly?  Because honestly… when I’m ready to lock myself in the bathroom with a bottle of wine, because these kids can’t seem to stand one another?  Well, instead, I
That’s right. I put them to bed, kiss them goodnight, and hit the treadmill.  Why?  Because I love to blare naughty music, and with my headphones in?  Well….

Peace and freaking quiet.
Yup.  For someone who couldn’t stand to run, or jog, without being chased by a clown holding a bloody knife?  Well, something clicked in me, and once I get on the treadmill and the kids are asleep?  Oh yeah, baby!
No, but seriously.  If you walk in while I’m running (Please don’t, it will scare the crap out of me), You bet your butt I’m lip-syncing to Florence and the Machine or Buckcherry.  
So I’ve made some changes in the last (almost) three months.  Changes that are so much more than body-related.  I’m happy.  HAPPY!  I have energy to do things like chase my boys, and climb up onto firetruck ladders with them.  At the fair people, I haven’t burned down the house or anything. I love the confidence I’m finding in myself to test my own limits, and the example I’m trying to set for my boys.  Because at where I was, it wasn’t about fitting into jeans, or being sexy.  It was about  saving my own life.  Since I started this?  Well, in the past month I haven’t had a single heart palpitation.  Not one! And the veins in my left leg that make me a stroke-risk while pregnant?  Yeah, those don’t hurt any more, even when I’m on my feet for hours!
EEEEEK!  No allergies, no heart palpitations, and tons of energy.
And the fun part (because it’s NOT the most important?):
This is what I looked like when I stepped on that scale three months ago.  I’d give you a full body shot, but I can’t find one, so the ball will have to do!
This is March
Brody’s birthday, 3 days before deployment (10 lbs down)
This is fourth of July, 40 lbs later:
Still working on it!
But today… today I tried on these pants.  And they fit.  Buttoned without strain.  Like… comfortable.  
1.  No judging the pic, peeps, there’s a shortage of photographers in the house and it was about 7 am, and I took the pic for Jason…  Man, my camisole is showing.  Nice.  At least it’s not the bathroom mirror.
2. I haven’t worn those pants since we took our kids on a trip.  In Germany.  In 2006.  
Okay, now that we all think it’s awesome that I’m back down to 2006 weight (I swear, I’m going backwards), now contemplate that I’ve been pack-ratting those pants for 7 years.  Yikes.

 So bottom line, I went Paleo and started running when Jason left.  I gave up processed foods, and sugar, and crap, and got my life back.  I’ve never felt physically better, which is something to say during this slightly awful year of deployment.

I’m not perfect.  I’m still overweight for my BMI, but I dropped myself out of the obese category.

On my deployment goals, I wanted to lose 30 lbs… 42 lbs later, now, I just want to feel healthy, and I’m getting there.  I honestly don’t miss the bread, the grains, the sugar, or even dairy.  I do get a twinge for cheese every now and again, but nothing could compare to the way by body feels and is functioning now.  
I stopped craving anything too sweet, or carbs in general.  Now I get up and I’m like…
I heart Paleo.
I love myself enough to keep it up, and keep the bad stuff out.
I’m not perfect, I’m just a work in progress… or bombshell in progress, rather, and I’m going to ROCK his homecoming.  You know… like after the New Year and all.
Oh, and after cranky, screaming, fighting kids… Thank God it’s a running night.  

4 Comments on “Bombshell in Progress”

  1. Jenn

    wow! That is so great and very very encouraging. 🙂 I just started a walk run program and have actually been love/hating it for a few weeks now. Love the afterwards high, hate the getting out and going running of it. Thanks or posting this!

  2. Julie Sondra Decker

    I'm glad I'm not the only one who posts pictures of food I make. Hahaa. 😀 Thanks for sharing!

  3. Angel84dsj

    I really enjoyed reading about your on going journey and loved your gifs. Congrats on going beyond your goals and continue the awesome work!!

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